Thanks 2021.
Hello reader, hope you are doing great, I appreciate the time you are taking to read this small non-info sec or general tech-based blog of mine.
Speaking of the year, to be honest, it was a great year for me. Well, it started being just a mentally captive nerd being emotionally dependent on the people on whom I should have distanced myself earlier. A lot of a time, we can not figure out whom and whom not to be emotionally dependent on, to be honest being emotionally dependent is a weak trait in my opinion. So yes, I learnt this a hard way, got baited by a few people who were pretty close to me, yes it does feel bad. But yes, when I learnt the fact that one should never expect, just don’t, half of my problems did solve immediately. The more self-dependent one is the more powerful it is. Sorry for the emo vibes, it is what it is.
Validation, you hear it right, just like an immature person one of my keen problems was to divert my actions depending on validations from both not-random & random people on the internet. So later when I found it out I kind of felt better than what was actually triggering my decisions and thankfully due to some instances this very year, I improved this and yes, the self-confidence is in a definite place, seeking peace and happiness, not validations. I was amazed at how amazing I felt when I kicked out this insecurity of mine, with just a pinch of self-confidence whenever I need it.
Music, damn Yung innanet thank you for making my year so amazing, possibly I am one of your greatest stans, jk hahaha! But yes I have heard every music of yours, starting from SMTP to injure. you to VLAN to obfuscate to tuntap and NOC along with FreqyXin, just awesome, oh wait! Did I say WinZip and 0101& !hook? man, you are a music wizard. Thanks again!
Breaking the insecurity of nervousness, hell yeah! I was the weirdest guy in the class, typically the last bench-er and with a shit ton of social anxiety(I still do have it right now tho a bit just), yeah am improving on that. Huge thanks to DEVINER & Vareesh for helping me to cope with this, offering me to speak in front of crowds, yes it was tough, but in the end, the feeling was pretty cool, I do have built a decent self-confidence after exposure to people. Yay! I am probably a less socially awkward guy now.
Anger issues, yeah we are old friends don’t worry! But lately, I had to bid my old friend goodbye. Thanks to HTTP. deep for suggesting me some therapies, to deal with my bad times and other insecurities. This guy is a man of culture. Keep up the good work little buddy! You are doing god’s work.
Time has come for some flexing hahahahah, this year I am happy with my team members from whom I learn at AX1AL. These guys T3CH_W1ZARD, Kumar are wizards. The dedication and time they have given to AXIAL are beyond awesome. These two & Dr Strange are somehow similar, except for the fact Dr Strange has some mystical powers and T3CH has his python programming skills & Kumar has his Node JS Skills, thanks once again mates, AXIAL would stand nowhere without you.
And other mates like Argonyte, Kenji & little astr0 thank you so much for hanging with AXIAL when we were just starting and putting in an enormous amount of work. You people are amazing.
Muffin.. the name sounds familiar eh? Not ringing? Lemme do it for you! Bad times, good times, when I was being 2-year emo crying for something to asking for suggestions and what not ,my brother has been from the very beginning helping me out in every difficult situation and aiding me out there , if someone who has taught me the most on how to live a non-insecure life and supporting my 2 brain cells it’s Muffin , thanks brother I owe you a hell lot, thank you for being the best.
Last but not the least, thanks to the special person for being there for the last 7 months & putting up with me, I love you, I will fall short on adjectives. You mean a lot to me ❤.
Thank you to everyone who supported me, I feel I am moving into 2022 with a better mental state, less anger & a logical thinker and most important with a pinch of self-confidence. Much Love!
A small summary for the reader, I know this blog is kind of cringe at places, kind of philosophical, kind of whatever it may be, but I wrote my heart out, so if some random nerd like me can deal with his insecurities, you too can and become a happy person, listen to yourself, love what you do, and surround yourself with witty people who value time & relationship over clout & attention, best of luck! am praying for ya! If you think your 2021 was not that good, I know at 2022 you are gonna make it whether it be a certification, or a job, or that degree you are gonna make it Kings & Queens! Good luck with your battles. I love you!
